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Diary of a CEO · 2023-04-27 · 1h 48m

The Surprising & Unbelievable Dark Side Of Open Relationships: Aubrey Marcus | E242

Aubrey Marcus on building and selling Onnit with Joe Rogan, psychedelics, an eight-year polyamory experiment, and learning radical relationship ownership.

The Surprising & Unbelievable Dark Side Of Open Relationships: Aubrey Marcus | E242
The guest

Aubrey Marcus — Founder of Onnit, the human-performance supplement company (maker of Alpha Brain) he built with Joe Rogan and sold to Unilever; podcaster, author, and founder of the Fit for Service community.

The gist

Aubrey Marcus traces his path from four-parent childhood and approval-seeking under a high-achieving but rage-prone father, through years of failed businesses, to founding Onnit. A 30-minute coffee with Joe Rogan, chosen over a Kentucky Derby party, became the pivot that led to Alpha Brain selling out in 12 hours and Onnit growing to ~$60M before its Unilever acquisition. He speaks candidly about psychedelic medicine as his tool for self-awareness, an eight-year polyamorous relationship with Whitney that ultimately broke him, and finding monogamous love with his wife Vylana. The conversation closes on conflict-resolution practices, his reliance on sleep medication, the Fit for Service community, and forgiveness.

Big reveals

  • With Joe Rogan as partner, Onnit's Alpha Brain sold out in 12 hours and the company grew from zero to roughly $60 million.
  • Marcus broke his father's lineage of rage after yelling at a sweet front-desk employee who then cried at her desk.
  • He skipped the Kentucky Derby with best friend Bode Miller to meet Joe Rogan for coffee, the choice that launched everything.
  • Onnit nearly went bankrupt ('cashpocalypse') after distributing all cash for an investment that never came; the CFO quit on the spot.
  • When his primary partner Whitney took her first lover, it 'absolutely broke' him despite his own polyamory.
  • After eight years he concluded he could never master polyamory and refused to do it again with Vylana.
  • Marcus admits ongoing reliance on stimulants and sleep medication he knows is harmful but keeps returning to.

Things worth remembering

  • His mother reached the Wimbledon semi-finals (losing to Billie Jean King) and his father, a futures trader, appears in the book Market Wizards.
  • Marcus claims deep breathwork produces endogenous DMT, the same psychedelic compound active in ayahuasca.
  • Onnit's link to Joe Rogan began when Marcus pitched Rogan's podcast as an ad slot for his client Fleshlight.
  • Onnit could only afford its first Alpha Brain batch via net-30 credit terms and sold through two orders before paying the first invoice.
  • Before Onnit, Marcus ran a failed men's nail-polish line inspired by fighters Chuck Liddell and Roger Huerta painting their nails.
  • Friends Christine Hassler and Stefanos resolve conflict by him going into a plow stretch and yelling at her 'between his own legs.'
  • He cites John Gottman's research that contempt, not arguing, predicts divorce, mirroring his own 'monster that eats love.'
  • Marcus bought Vylana's wedding ring before they had even had sex, certain she was 'his queen.'

Recommended in this episode

Books, products and media the guest or host genuinely endorsed here — with the buy link.

Affiliate link — we may earn a commission at no extra cost to you.

Guest’s ownProduct

Alpha Brain

Onnit

“when all of that came together and we launched Alpha Brain, it just clicked. We sold out of that product in 12 hours.” — Aubrey Marcus 00:32:24
Find it on Amazon
Guest’s ownProduct

Onnit

Aubrey Marcus

“that dinner turned into a friendship, and out of that friendship developed really, I was starting a supplement company, developed Onnit as we know it now” — Aubrey Marcus 00:30:18
Find it on Amazon
RecommendedBook

Sex at Dawn

Chris Ryan

“it was really the book Sex at Dawn by by Chris Ryan that actually opened my mind to this idea that there is a different concept” — Aubrey Marcus 00:56:45
Find it on Amazon