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Diary of a CEO · 2022-09-01 · 1h 43m

James Smith: Become Confident In 100 Minutes | E174

Personal trainer James Smith breaks down confidence as evidence-based belief built through action, audacity, repetition and a willingness to lose.

James Smith: Become Confident In 100 Minutes | E174
The guest

James Smith — British personal trainer turned online fitness entrepreneur and author of Not a Diet Book, Not a Life Coach, and a new book on confidence; returning Diary of a CEO guest.

The gist

James Smith returns to argue that confidence is not an innate trait or superpower but a set of values and beliefs built on evidence you gather by taking action. He explains why everyone has gaps in their confidence, how pain points motivate change, and why audacity and a healthy relationship with failure matter more than success. The conversation ranges across dating, monogamy, alcohol, masturbation and 'utility of deprivation', work-life balance, purpose, and the danger of boredom. Smith recounts his lowest point in Sydney in 2017 that led him to buy a whiteboard and go live on Facebook, sparking his online career. The episode closes on small daily disciplines, incompletable goals, and the power of simply asking.

Big reveals

  • Liver King privately told Bartlett that speaking in front of people cripples him so badly he can't sleep, and that he was bullied and beaten daily from age 10 to 14.
  • Smith names 13th March 2017 in Sydney as the worst day of his life, when he was failing as a trainer and borrowing 500 pounds from his dad to buy a sofa.
  • That same day he walked to Officeworks, bought a whiteboard and markers, and went live on Facebook to 3,000 followers, starting his online business.
  • Bartlett reveals the first email he ever sent asking for investment landed his first investor, who gave him 10 grand when he was stealing pizzas to feed himself.
  • A stranger working on a laptop in a Croatian minivan recommended The 4-Hour Workweek to Smith, and within three weeks he flew one-way to Australia.
  • Smith's actionable confidence exercise, credited to Tim Ferriss, is asking for a 10 percent discount on a coffee purely to practice tolerating discomfort.
  • Bartlett's earlier episode inspired Smith to upgrade his microphones, cameras and editing for his own podcast.

Things worth remembering

  • In a study from The Expectation Effect, people falsely told they had a gene hindering oxygen turnover still performed worse, showing priming changes physical output.
  • Up to 50 percent of patients given sham surgeries, cut open and stitched with nothing done, reported feeling better.
  • Smith frames confidence and anxiety as a spectrum: anxiety predicts failure, confidence predicts success.
  • 93 percent of people say they are above-average drivers, a statistically impossible figure illustrating human overconfidence.
  • Most exoneration cases stem from faulty eyewitnesses, showing how confidently wrong people can be.
  • People fear flying and shark attacks more than driving or drowning, despite the latter being far more deadly, due to availability bias.
  • Mark Manson's line that people would care less about others' opinions if they realised how seldom they happen, plus studies showing people overestimate how much others notice them.
  • Ashley Madison, a dating site for married people with millions of users, was brought down by hackers.
  • Smith discusses Jordan Peterson's 'utility of deprivation' and how modern porn access exceeds what a man could see in decades.

Recommended in this episode

Books, products and media the guest or host genuinely endorsed here — with the buy link.

Affiliate link — we may earn a commission at no extra cost to you.

Guest’s ownBook

Confidence

James Smith

“i learned you'd written a book about confidence why did you write a book about confidence” — James Smith 00:01:35
Find it on Amazon
Guest’s ownBook

Not a Diet Book

James Smith

“the first book not a diet book i went through years of fitness industry and kind of by the end of it through my own journeys” — James Smith 00:02:06
Find it on Amazon
Guest’s ownBook

Not a Life Coach

James Smith

“the things we spoke about in that last podcast were based off not a life coach now the kind of strange thing” — James Smith 00:02:37
Find it on Amazon
RecommendedBook

The 4-Hour Workweek

Tim Ferriss (inferred)

“he recommended the book four hour by week and i got home and i read through it and there were some things that just didn't apply” — James Smith 01:25:42
Find it on Amazon
RecommendedBook

The Slight Edge

Jeff Olson (inferred)

“those small disciplines end up defining us over the long term as one of my favorite books the slight edge um describes” — Steven Bartlett 01:37:03
Find it on Amazon